Today's Grocery Shop

I love food and I love to see what's in peoples' grocery carts at the store, what's in their refrigerators and their cupboards.

In light of that, I'm sharing my grocery shop today. Here's what we came home with:

chicken breast (2 packs - they were BOGO)

ground beef (for the dog's food)

a pot roast (for dinner tonight)

diet pepsi

cream soda

orange c-plus

light sour cream

vanilla greek yogurt (I'm very excited about this!)

tassimo single serve coffee pods

light cream cheese

light spinach cream cheese

velveeta shells and cheese

whole wheat KD

baby shrimp

2% milk

2 packages of bagels (BOGO)

unbleached all-purpose flour

spinach nuggets

falafel

Old Dutch all-dressed chips

2 packs mushrooms (BOGO)

yellow onions

green bell pepper

broccoli

turnip

multigrain tostitos

whole wheat pitas

oatmeal brown bread

multigrain bread

So there - that's it, in all its delicious glory. Some good, some bad. I also just made a trip to the Costco, so we've got lots of great stuff here to add on to what we picked up.

We spent $125.

You're Such a Card!

Another strange thing about me. I get a HUGE kick out of greeting cards. It's a bit unnatural, actually.

Today's great finds:

This is actually a tablet of citations:

I laughed out loud at this one:

Now that I've revealed a couple of strange things about me, why don't you tell me something strange about you? It'll make me feel better. :-S

Excited to Run?

I'm excited to run tomorrow.

I'm sure this is just a weird thing about me, but I'll share anyway. Sometimes when I go grocery shopping I buy really good stuff, the stuff I love to eat. Then when I get home, I want to eat it all right then because it's good. It doesn't even have to be junky food - it can be healthy food too. It's like I'm thinking, "I'm going to eat all of these blueberries and yogurt right now. The more I eat of it, the healthier I'll be." Funny, huh?

I just want to go out running right now because I'm really looking forward to my run tomorrow morning.

I'm that kind of weird.

Sometimes You Just Need to Have a Good Cry

If you know me, you know that I'm pretty tough, and that I've got spunk and a lot of attitude. If that's bad, I don't care. It's me. I'm stubborn, and a perfectionist, and I like getting what I want. I'm a very determined lady and once I have a goal in mind, you'd might as well hand it over to me - I'm that kind of stubborn and determined girl. Don't tell me I can't have something, or that I can't do something - it will become my life's mission to prove you wrong.

I'm also sentimental (although not often openly). I'm hard on myself and I carry a lot of insecurities that I try not to let show. At least I'll admit that, right? I have too much love for other people and although I try to show them with kindness, generosity, and humour, it scares the heck out of me to show anyone love. I also have a lot of love for myself, but I don't express it the same way I express my love to others. I think I'm harder on myself because even though other people can always leave my life, I'll never escape myself.

Where is this going?

Lately I've really been feeling like I'm letting other people I love down. I'm letting myself down. I'm getting very overwhelmed by all of this thinking about it. So...

Yesterday, I knew just what I needed - a run. I had been looking forward to it all week, waiting for Sunday's run. I love running. I do most of my best thinking while running. I feel my best during a run, at least most of the time, but running serves another purpose for me too. For me, running has this ability to bring to the surface those tiny things I've been trying to keep down.

I ran one of the worst runs I can remember running yesterday. I have a run like that about once every four to six months, and I know it's because I'm not in a good head space, and something needs to bubble up to the surface so I can face it. I got a good look at it about twenty minutes in to my run yesterday. I had a little cry (don't tell anyone that). I exhausted myself both physically and emotionally.

Today is better. I think I'm better equipped to face the world again. You can bet I won't be missing my run next week either. I need to check back to make sure I'm heading where I need to be going.

Day 4

Hump day, so to speak.

Today was not fun. I was woken up by a phone call from my co-worker Brian.

I wore skinny jeans to work (yes, I did buy a pair - we have a love-hate relationship).

My entire workday was a bust, and I'm really frustrated about it, but that's another vent for another time.

Somehow I managed to keep my arse in the boat:

Breakfast - a breakfast quesadilla and copious amounts of coffee
Snack - a cup of blueberries
Lunch - salad with lots of greens, tomatoes, cheddar, lean ham, an egg white, and cucumbers. Also a granola bar.
Dinner - a veggie burger on a thin bun and sweet potato fries
Snack - a slice of zucchini bread

Tomorrow morning, Steve and I are off to the market to meet Sarah King (!) and J. I expect we'll buy some great cheese and samosas. They also have these wonderful new things - cinnamon roasted nuts. I'm betting I'll be bringing those home too. Tomorrow will also include a grocery run.

Oh, and of course, there was a realization today:

My work will set me off enough to eat. Today was very stressful and anxiety-provoking. It was nearly enough for me to grab a chocolate bar, or pick up fast food on the way home. But I didn't. I did however, consciously recognize what was going on. That's pretty big for me. It'll be important for me to stay on top of this, since my work is incredibly demanding a lot of the time.

I deflected my "food reward" for a cookbook reward instead. I managed to find the time to run to a bookstore between phone calls this evening to pick up two new cookbooks. *beams*

Who Wouldn't Want to Come Home to This Little Monster?

This is what greets me every day when I get home from work...

Day 3

*Sigh*

So I'm just going to get this right out of the way. I ate terribly today. I made bad choices. I was tempted and caved. Meh.

Breakfast: Blueberry oatmeal muffin

Lunch: Bowl of corn chowder

Afternoon snack: sugar-free Jones soda, cup of blueberries

Dinner: a footlong Subway lobster sub


Did everyone catch that I ate an entire footlong sub for dinner?

Let me tell you today's Subway story. Stephen suggested we have Subway for dinner. I used to pick up Subway for us once a week, which I've gotten out of the habit of doing. It has been very hot here this week though, and I didn't feel like cooking, so I agreed.

I went out for a run after work like a good little weight losing runner. I parked in the Subway parking lot and hit the trail that runs just behind it for my run. This way I could just grab Subway after the run and head home.

The Subway is packed. I wait a few minutes, no big deal, and people continue to file in after me. I order our subs - mine being a lobster sub, Stephen's being a steak and bacon melt. The people are great making our subs really quickly, but the person in front of me had issues with his debit card and we all got held up at the cash.

It was at this time that the lady behind me in line leans over and says, "I hope the steak tastes better than it looks."

Um, what? Now I know that the Subway steak subs aren't made with filet mignon. But I've eaten the Subway steak and quite like it. It looked the same it always does, and when you put bacon and melted cheese on it, I couldn't see how that would taste bad.

It really made me wonder something. We all meet people in this world who are arses. But, do the arses in this world have people they consider to be arses? How arsey are those people?

I did have a small victory today that I'd like to tell you about too. I realized today that I would need to stop at the store and buy new ice cream if I planned on having my regular half cup for a snack tonight. Yes, this is how much I think about ice cream. I didn't stop to get any. It wasn't because I forgot either. I just didn't stop.

There is ice cream on the list of things to pick up tomorrow.

Day 2

Day 2's been better than day 1.

I don't feel quite as hungry. My arms are firmly attached.

I was telling my friend Jan awhile ago that I've been running with some guys from work three lunch hours a week for quite a while now, and today was one of the first days I questioned whether I could continue. See, they're tall, and fast. It's getting harder and harder to keep up as we get into longer running intervals. I'm going to keep going with them until I just really can't do it anymore. Hopefully as the summer heat subsides, I'll be able to continue.

Here's today's menu:

Breakfast: an oatcake (not my best choice, I know)

Lunch: vegetable soup and a turkey sandwich on whole wheat

Afternoon snack: granola bar and a perrier

Dinner: buffalo chicken salad (lettuce, cherry tomatoes, sauteed peppers/mushrooms/onions/tofu, Frank's buffalo wing sauce, cheese)

Snack: Handful of fritos corn chips (so far)


Last night's snack was ice cream, and I expect that'll happen again tonight. I will measure a half a cup of PC Loads of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, and eat it out of the measuring cup, as I do every single night of my life.

I'm already off to a great start this week. I consider myself having a good week if I'm on the plus side in terms of points. At this moment, I've used 4 flex points, but I've already earned 5 in APs this week, so I'm at a +1 right now. This is fantastic for my second day in. If I can make it through day 3 or 4 at near even, I'm good to go.

Day 1

No one fails on day 1. Things don't start to go awry until at least day 4. That's kind of funny to me too, considering I spend my first few days "on plan", hungry.

So today was good. I hope tomorrow will be easier.

Breakfast was yogurt, berries, and coffee.

Morning snack was a banana.

Lunch was a salad with greens, peppers, cucumber, egg whites, ham, and feta. Salad was followed by a nectarine.

Afternoon snack was another nectarine and a small granola bar.

Before my run I had some blueberries.

Dinner was two veggie dogs, one wheat bun, onions fried in olive oil, and broccoli.

I've got lots of room left for a snack again later. :-)


I know a lot of you are probably not happy about reading what I'm eating. If you don't like it, don't read it. I think that putting it out there will help me make better choices and will help me be more accountable.

I Need Help

There, I've said it. I need help.

I've gained a bit of weight, and I haven't done a thing about it. This has gone on long enough.

I need to do something about it now.

Lisa and I have decided to do this together, a couple of weeks ago. My first couple of weeks were great, then last week I went on vacation.

Well, no more.

I'm back.

I will be following my own guidelines for this, very challenge-like. I've put a request out there to the GDT, but I don't think this will work for me if I'm accountable to a group of mostly strangers. I need help from those who know and whom I'm hoping love me, at least a little. This will work for me because I won't want to disappoint you.

My challenge starts tomorrow morning, with a WI. There are almost 10 weeks left before I'm in Toronto. I will be 12-15 lbs lighter by then. That would make me a very happy girl, and much more comfortable in my own skin.

Knowing myself better than anyone, I am not going to be expecting perfection. I am going to be expecting healthy eating and increased exercise.

I'm going to be accountable to all of you, and I am going to be successful.

Love yous,
Tara