Sh!t My Boyfriend Says

We're watching TV. The dog is curled up on his bed on the floor.

Him: "What do you think of the dog?"

Me: "He looks suspicious, doesn't he?" *grinning - our dog is adorable*

Him: "I think he looks like a gnome dog."

Me: "You mean he looks like gnome? That's not very nice."

Him: "But if a gnome had a dog, it would look like him, you know?"

*sigh*